“Strange noises that were not from my world”
‘There was something wrong with me perhaps. I have often dreamt of lights running over my body and each time when I woke up startled my brothers and sister playfully thumped me over the head because I was being silly of course.
The food, I remember the food mother gave me. Do I remember it or maybe it’s just the taste or the smell that I recall, it was delicious.
Maybe not delicious but nourishing and how I needed that nourishment now.
Weakened, tired and hungry I wept and cried to get fed to be cleaned but there was nothing.
I was itching all over and my eyes burnt.
My life was suddenly only a few moments away from ceasing to exist.
I’d seen my sister stop moving.
What was it like I didn’t know, but my mother cried and so I did too, my older brothers and sisters wept but didn’t know why; all I knew then was that my mother was sad and watching her mournful meant something was wrong.
Would she be sad for me now?
My eyes hurt, I still itched all over and I knew it was because something was eating me. Mother had warned me of them and I had always paid attention but something went wrong.
I know it was the lights. They came for us. It was no dream this time.
I’d begun screaming. Something tightened around my chest, I wanted to run away but there was barely anything I could see. I was being eaten alive and I couldn’t run. There was no ground beneath me.
I felt constricted and all I could do was scream.
Mother, please hear me. Save me.
I don’t know where I am anymore.
But there is ground underneath and I don’t feel the itching pain anymore.
I still can’t see well but I know it doesn’t hurt as much and everything feels somewhat unearthly now.
Am I scared? I’m not sure but it is difficult to understand and explain.
Mother isn’t here. My older brothers and sisters are gone too. I seek familiar places to crawl under and wait for them but I’m unable to.
Something pulls me away, something always finds me and I see odd long objects moving. They’re strange, unworldly like those lights. Unnatural and I scream in their face but they aren’t scared.
Maybe I’m not screaming loud enough.
Mother had taught me to bare my teeth. At least I think she had but I’d forgotten. So I gnashed my teeth as best from what I remembered but I wasn’t successful.
The coiling alien objects retracted only for a moment and began touching me. I was terror-stricken
The same tightening sensation all over my body which didn’t hurt but it was strange nevertheless and I was adamant.
I will scream, I will bare my teeth and not panic.
Can you hear me, mother? My eyes are burning up.
Mother holds me and I hear familiar noises coming from her. I understand this tone and my face is buried in the corner of her face.
I like how it smells and she knows I’m hungry.
The food is delicious and there’s plenty of it.
There’s a haunting placidness. The sounds have suddenly stopped and I find myself crying again.
There’s no one around me. It feels familiarly alarming and I’m worried and scared.
I sleep even though I know my body isn’t tired.
There’s a far off place I have seen. It’s in another dimension. I hear sounds coming from it but I could never go there. It’s out of my reach.
There’s a world beyond this mysterious wall. It’s a world I can see and smell but I can never touch it. Mother doesn’t let me.
I’ve told her I want to see it but she shuns this idea.
I’m looking at her, shouting to be heard but she’s making a different sound that is usually followed by her locking me in space.
I don’t want to be locked I tell her but I think I have angered her.
Why doesn’t she ever listen to me?
The wind kisses my face and I run.
I hear something behind me, but it’s a too late mother. I am out, out through another portal in a different space.
It smells strange, it looks strange and I’m lost.
What should I do?
I look behind me to see how far I’ve left home.
Mother is right there.
Standing, making sounds that she does when I’ve been naughty.
No. These are different sounds.
I’ve never heard them before.
I love this smell.
I had been locked up in a space but I don’t remember much because I went to sleep.
I’m not hungry I tell mother and look through the wall that I can’t seem to cross. I tried climbing it the other day but it was infinite.
I’ve seen mother step out easily enough but she knows how to never let me go through.
Sometimes I hate her because she doesn’t try to understand me. She must hate me too because I feel her rage through the noises coming from her.
More than once I have felt compelled to run away from her presence but only for a moment.
She calls me back and I can’t stay away.
I am churlish sometimes and I know how to hurt her which I do and it angers me when she tries to keep me from doing what I want.
I’m no child
Hear me. Hear me. Hear me. Hear me.
I might have upset her because she won’t look where I stand, crying to be heard waiting for her attention.
No, I’m not hungry mother, I just.. I just..yes she understands me now. I love how she smells. The slowly trembling sounds that pulsate from her, reverberate through me and this is all I wanted, mother.
She hugs me tight, strokes my face and goes through the wall I stare at each day.
How easy is it for her.
I’m here.
Finally, I’m here. It’s different from the other portal I’d run through. This feels more inviting. I remember this feeling. Or maybe I dreamt it.
I look around.
Mother is standing beside me. I feel protected and I don’t know if this is what I really want but I cannot stand being without her.
Maybe I am hungry, mother.
Meow’
