victim

Come now sweetheart anguish
how should I invoke thee?
content life is a joke
too convivial for me
where are the dreary dungeons
painfully high doldrums
where can I slump and mope
inject myself with poison
call it merry dope
apathetic boredom!
now that's the place to dwell
inhale a sorry breath
watch my chest swell
in agonizing torment hate this grotesque world
unzip my sack of sufferings that I carry around like a tote
I been done wrong
these regrets aren't my own
slathered upon me by hateful those
who couldn't watch me cope
with the sadness I befriended
for it truly understands my needs
sticking close by me
whispering of cruel deeds
that are inflicted upon my person
by those who say they love me
how could they possibly expect
I'd share their loathsome glee?
Are these tears not opaque?
haven't I already cried a lake?
Is it too much to ask
for a ready hand at task
wiping my face forever
not once stopping to say never
why needs must I always smile
when my head and heart are filled with bile
don't I know what they think?
smirking contempt hidden in their knowing wink
accusing me, if you can imagine
of dwelling forever on a melancholic brink
what would you have done
if your pain was always shunned?
if no one cared about your moist eyes?
after a thousand times of your whimpering cries
washed in permanent shrouds
of sobbing depressive clouds
fools they be presumptuous too
if they can't recognize my martyr halo.